The minute someone thinks they know you ,
has you figured out..
And you accidentally amplify one of their insecurities about something else by simply being, and somehow touch on the subject, directly or indirectly, even non specific to them-
Theyre brought right back to feeling insecure about that other thing.
Even if it has nothing to do with you.
You serve as a temporary waveguide/mirror/reminder/whatever- and they either look at it in themselves or avoid it in a new way until it comes up again for their opportunity to grow from it by coming to peace with it under new clarity.
But the predominant issue lies in the person with the insecurity anthropormorphising that trait onto you in a transferrance/ association,
Because this act is one of avoidance of owning up to processing the uncomfortable subject at hand , and often times the person who was the triggering mechanism gets blamed or now has that quality improperly attributed to them- from the perspective of the person having a hard time.
People do way too much of this.
One important thing to realize,
Most people are peacefully going about their existances,
Doing the best they can,
And not trying to go out of their way to screw with other people.
The ones that do that second thing,
Are best left to their own devices until they learn to play nice with others,
But in general no decision needs to be made-
Most people truly mean well all the time.
The next time something has cone up thats troubling you,
First communicate within yourself and ask whats occurred,
And then ask them about the situation as it unfolded to your memory.
Often you will see the disparity between their intentions and your percueved meaning right away.
Growth happens when you can understand the event objectively for what it is, without needing to compartmentalize it or be negatively affected by it. Not necessarily in that if there is a concrete physical harmful effect, but in allowing yourself to see something for what it is, and impartial to any previous hurt that caysed when it happened in the past. Seeing things as just occurring is wonderful, because really-
Most everybody does not mean you harm.